Reaction Post - Nothing's simple, is it.

The Good Wife: 3x19 Blue Ribbon Panel.

• First of, just a general thing: I wish I had more time to devote to this show because I miss out on a lot of details and stuff that goes back to earlier episodes, but the point of these is that they are the one thing that I actually manage to write pretty quickly quickly - hence "reaction post". But they don't do the show justice so maybe I'll have to figure out something else next season. 
• One of the themes this season, or maybe the show itself, is... wanting things? Figuring out what you want, what you have to do to get it, if you can live with being the kind of person that wants and gets things, figuring out your priorities - and changing. I actually really liked the case of the week because it was more directly linked to Alicia's development over these past years than these cases usually are. Diane got her into the titular panel, made up of judges and a priest, that reviews criminal investigations. Alicia being Alicia, she immediately started to break the unwritten rules - like, at first the way the thing was run just bothered her but she kept quiet and played along, but then things just got so blatantly ridiculous that she couldn't sit still any more - and that's Alicia. Constantly being told to just keep still and stay in the bit of space that she is given, but WANTING more. She discovers some blatant errors in an investigation into the shooting of an innocent Good Samaritan by a police officer, but then that other thing happens that's been haunting her all season: she can have her victory over the gross structures and the privileged white men, but it also means putting Peter in danger, since the SA's office fucked up the original investigation. Literally: "Either the lie that protects your husband or the truth that hurts him". Alicia recuses herself. 
• "You don't have to impress us". 
• The whole thing was just done so perfectly, because Alicia came in as the outsider, THE woman, and first managed to turn the panel a little bit in her favour by appealing to THE black, and then Matthew Perry brutally pointed out to her that the same privilege that got her the position at the firm (and they are still debating that, right? if they are really just keeping Alicia around because of Peter, and this whole season has been about her showcasing that she is valuable on her own, without her connections, that, if anything, the connection makes her vulnerable now but she is able to overcome that vulnerability?) is now fucking with her ability to make the right decision, because she doesn't want Peter to fail. And this whole thought process is new, too - this isn't the same Alicia from a couple of years ago, she has this new level of consciousness where she thinks about the right thing to do but also the smart thing, the self-preserving thing, the "billable hours" and all the things about power that Kalinda taught her over the years, and at the same time, realizing that she has become this person scares her. 
• And I think that this fear, or this conflict, this constant question of "do I still like who I am" is part of the reason why she keeps going back to that house. It's the fond memories of her kids growing up there and the fact that they had a good time, before things turned awful (and they always do turn awful, even in her memories), but it's also, maybe, remembering how SHE used to be, back then. I think it's pretty clear that she SHOULDN'T BUY THE HOUSE, so the way this turned out - "there's another Florrick" - is brilliant, because Jackie is the one holding on to the past so fiercely, to an extent that it makes her a dangerous enemy, and it's cool that she's back now after being mostly absent for the season, almost like it's the surprising reveal towards the end - here's the big bad, pulling all the strings, except it's Jackie Florrick who uses all her ambition on her son and who knows what damage she could cause if she really tried, because the kids, especially Grace, really want that house. 
• Alicia put on her fighting clothes before going to Jackie. 
• Cary, when he's being asked if Peter's decision in that case had anything to do with race: I can't answer that. But I can be offended. (except there's a really uncomfortable pattern emerging from all of this, isn't there?)
• Also, Kalinda... Alicia is starting to ask questions about her IRS issues because they are having a meeting, and hilariously, the one specific case she chooses to ask about is the Diane-one with the guns and Alicia realizes that Kalinda isn't just keeping her own secrets but also other people's - and then it turns out that Lana Delaney is behind all of it, possibly because she has lost her mind, as previous exes have done (she also shares that hilarious jealousy that some of Kalinda's exes seem to share - "You're friends, aren't you?" - the most complicated question of all), but she also asked Alicia specifically about Bishop and there is always a chance that Blake and Kalinda's old identity are eventually going to come up. 
• Lana seems to be no match for Kalinda though, at least for now? And she's vulnerable (Kalinda awesomely openly flirts with her exactly the way Lana usually does, except she chooses the FBI cafeteria and not some anonymous back alley café) 
• "Just so you know, if you want to talk about business, we talk about business. if you want to talk about something else, we can talk about something else. Just don't mix the two."
• Kalinda, after the meeting with the IRS: You got a little hot in there. ("I lost my house. I'm losing it.") - and Kalinda absolutely loves that side of Alicia, and how could she not. 
• In other plots this week, Will uses an elderly person to protect his position at the firm because Eli, David and Julius are amateurs and Will and Diane aren't. THE CORNER OFFICE IS CLOSER TO THE BATHROOM!
• Diane, hilariously, about the other partners: They are children who've been told they can't have a toy which makes them want it more but if they got it, they'd just break it, so we've gotta keep it out of reach. 

Alicia: I gotta go.
Peter: Wait a minute, where are you going?
Alicia: TO BUY A GUN.