On living with the monster in the room

Das Lied zum Sonntag

Mount Kimbie feat Andrea Balency - You Look Certain (I'm Not So Sure) (on Love What Survives)

 

I can't have control over everything
Standing in the corner
Feeling like I don't need anyone
Losing my balance
Making problems out of whatever I see

Das (Lied) zum Sonntag

Pocket Skate Mag - Bhutan w/ Barney Page, Jasper Dohrs, Daiki Hoshino, Nestor Judkins & More

  

random mixtape - that's why i love fall.

girl in red | we fell in love in october. the xx | shelter. caribou | sun. sonic youth | hey joni. alice glass | blood oath. health | nice girls. you love her coz she's dead | blood lust. caribou | hannibal. bikini kill | for tammy rae.

Reading List: February.

Non-Fiction: 

 

Chris Baker, Pasuk Phongpaichit: A History of Thailand. 

Thongchai Winichakul: Siam mapped: a history of the geo-body of a nation.

 

Fiction: 

 

Margot Douaihy: Divine Ruin. 

Yoko Ogawa: The Memory Police.

Ellis Avery: The Teahouse Fire. 

Jean Kyoung Frazier: Pizza Girl.  

Tan Twan Eng: The Gift of Rain. 

Nina McConigley: How to Commit a Postcolonial Murder.  

 

Films: 

 

Qing mei zhu man (1985, Edward Yang). 

Kong bu fen zi (1986, Edward Yang).

Ma jiang (1996, Edward Yang). 

Yi yi (2000, Edward Yang). 

Revolver Lily (2023, Isao Yukisada). 

Rosemead (2025, Eric Lin). 

Kaj ti je deklica (2025, Urška Djukić). 

 

Shows: 

 

Pluto the Series, Season One. 

The Loyal Pin, Season One. 

Friendly Rivalry, Season One. 

Revolver Lily

There is a deep sadness to the idea of being incredibly good at something, perhaps even one of the best in the world, but for that talent to be associated only with death and sadness. At the beginning of Revolver Lily, Yuri Ozone (Haruka Ayase) has retired from her career as a famed assassin. She has settled into a life where she keeps the company of rich men happy to pay for having drinks with a beautiful woman. She lives with two women she seems very close to, one like a daughter, the other like a partner (later she will say that they are "pledged to death" to each other). The year is 1924 (a year after the devastating Great Kantō Earthquake, the political context, which plays an important role in Isao Yukisada’s film, is Japan’s military ambition as bloodthirsty leaders of its army and navy struggle for the resources to build up for future wars of conquest. Yuri is forced back into the life she has left behind when a boy (Jinsei Hamura), the last survivor of a brutal attack on his family (by, as we later find out, army men in civilian clothes), seeks out her help. She reads about the murder of the family in the newspaper and finds the name of someone she knows, and knows not to be a murderer, associated with the crime, and goes to investigate. Shinta comes across her accidentally, but she happens to be the person he was told to find for help. He is carrying vital documents, she is deeply reluctant, but can’t help but use her abilities to save him, again and again, as he gets himself into increasingly desperate situations, from those who seek to harm him. As she returns to her old life, memories of her past trauma – the loss of her own family, her own child – haunt her, explaining why she approaches this responsibility with stoicism and the sadness that comes with having to return to something she has left behind for a reason. Eventually, when she realises how personally connected she is to Shinta’s family, her full frustration at being unable to live in peace and away from the violence comes out. It is thanks to Ayase’s outstanding performance that her complex emotions shine through in spite of Yuri’s toughness and strength. It becomes apparent immediately how good Yuri is at causing harm. Her abilities outweigh her opponents even when they are armed with weapons superior to hers, her movements so precise and fast that in the blink of an eye, she leaves only devastation behind. The fight scenes are beautifully choreographed, especially when she is fighting a worthy opponent who challenges her. It’s difficult not to be in awe.

The true accomplishment of the film is the inherent dissonance at its heart: Revolver Lily is a film opposing militarisation and warmongering, but to achieve these goals, its main character has to resort to – practised, precise, devastating – violence. The film pits the individual but reluctant heroism of Yuri against both the individual ambitions of powerful men and the institutional violence of a military apparatus that is seeking future glory, with the actual history of Japan throughout the 1930s and 1940s looming over the narrative as the known outcome that nothing Yuri accomplishes here can ultimately prevent, only delay.

Visually, Revolver Lily is stunning. The sets and costuming are beautiful. The film captures a period of transition in Japan, expressed through the presence of Western dress alongside traditional clothing. It juxtaposes the modern army – uniformed, armed with rifles and guns, not swords – against older styles of one-on-one battle. Nothing expresses the confusion and chaos of this period in-between better than a small moment between Yuri’s attorney and adviser Iwami (Hiroki Hasegawa), who seeks the help of an old friend who is working on his Cubist painting in the middle of his traditional living room. This is a society undergoing radical change, a moment of flux, and Yuri alongside her friends and companions is attempting to steer it towards a less violent outcome – ultimately a doomed effort, but Revolver Lily makes the attempt look spectacular. 

2023, directed by Isao Yukisada, starring Haruka Ayase, Hiroki Hasegawa, Jinsei Hamura, Kavka Shisodo.

Das Lied zum Sonntag

Dry Cleaning - The Cute Things (on Secret Love)

 

I'm willing
To change roles
For you