Transparent: 1x08 Best New Girl.
Best New Girl is one of my favourite episodes in the stellar first season of Transparent. It takes place completely in the past – in 1994. For now, we’ve watched things change gradually, characters slowly moving into new lives, making choices, adapting, but this episode captures a moment for each of them that had an impact. Transparent is so inherently about memories and how people think back on their past, trying to make sense of their present and their identities that way, and Best New Girl offers a new insight into why the Pfefferman’s (and not just Maura) are the way they are. It’s almost entirely Maura’s episode, who, in 1994, pretended to go to a political science conference but in fact joined Mark and Camp Camellia. Ali conveniently decided against having a Bat Mitzvah, which freed Maura to leave, and we get a glimpse of how desperately Shelley cares about the impression this leaves on her community, fearing that her daughter’s decision will impact her own standing (which is also an insight into why Maura couldn’t even consider living openly in 1994, if Ali’s decision alone kept Shelley awake at night). Shelley laves too, escapes from putting one and one together, distancing herself from her whole family because she cannot deal with Maura’s unexpressed needs. That leaves the children to roam freely. Sarah goes off to a protest (on the bus on the way there, a girl saves her from a gross boy – the episode doesn’t show any more than that). Josh takes off with Rita, and we get a sense of how utterly smitten he was with her, how those memories of the past must look in his head. Ali is left to her own devices, and hitchhikes to the beach, where she picks up a much older man, who does not take advantage of her.
Maura’s experience is more complex. Camp Camellia, at first, is exuberant for her, being surrounded by people who seem to be similar to her, who can walk freely and be themselves in the safety of a camp, away from their families and everyone they are keeping secrets from. But the experience is soon tarnished because Maura realizes that this isn’t quite her community: a previous member is now frowned upon because she chose to actually transition. Maura is shocked to hear Marcy express that they are still men, just cross-dressing men, and later on, Marcy has a much easier time in transforming temporarily back to Mark when he calls his family (and he is shocked when Maura insists on keeping her dress and wig on for the ride home – being herself is bliss for her, and she will enjoy every hour that she gets). It’s a fundamental difference between the two. Maura watches how pragmatically the wife of someone at the camp is dealing with the situation (even if it was a struggle for her too), and realizes that Shelley will never be that woman, will never allow her to be herself, all the time, that she will always be stuck pretending unless things change radically. Mark doesn’t want things to change radically, he is perfectly happy becoming Marcy occasionally, while away, as a respite of sorts. There are more layers to this, as the episode hints that Mark may be in love with Maura, and realizing that she wants something else than he does hurts him too (the show is brilliant at showing how people hurt each other inadvertently by not noticing, or not caring enough, or not being on the same page emotionally).
There is always the contrast between the idea that Maura is trapped, trapped in a body that is not yet allowed to express its identity apart from these secret places, trapped in a marriage where she cannot be herself, and the sheer exuberance and joy when she just gets to express herself and be wholly in a moment, as she is with Connie in 1994.
Random notes:
The title song for this episode is different.
There must be some kind of dark magic involved in how perfectly the children are cast, and how completely they resemble the people they will eventually become in the present time.
Mark tells his son to "man up", and the transphobia (and misogyny) coming to the surface is awful. This is not Marcy's Shangri-La.
Ali’s performance is captivating.
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